I have written my floating thoughts on men in my Life..However this post is specially dedicated to the pillar of my life..My little brother who is no more the one I envy being loved more by others.
A vague memory of him is what I have when he was a year old and I was 3. 2yrs difference and I couldnt hate him more for stealing the limelight. I was possessive of everyone around him, but he being the cutest with his curly hair, chubby cheeks and those all time drunk eyes.. Anyone could fall in love with him.
As a we grew, I knew he was more protective about me than my father. He couldnt tolerate boys looking at me in the park, forget talking to me. he would always hang out with me and my friends, his curiosity, his eagerness on whom I choose for company amused me. My 1st love letter was handed to him by a boy when he was in 5th std..The letter in blood, written in hindi his eyes only had 1 question when he handed it over to me, who is he?? Do u like him?
Never realized how I became the dependent on him. I was studious, he was smarter, I was emotional, he was practical, I was matured, he was impulsive. My never ending tears always found his arms, My over the top dramas of suicide always saved my his acts. 1 incident was when I gave up on life while I was 11yrs old and started banging head to the pillars of the stairs (Too much influenced by movies), he cooly arranged a note book for each of the pillars and watched while I got frustrated. I gave up after taking out his 11 books around the stairs.
We have our weirdest stories in lots to quote like above, my favorite being the one I mentioned. He moving to hostel was nothing less dramatic, what changed the equation was when he was back and he realized someone else had taken his duty of protecting me.
Through our walk at wee hours and his KBC kind of questions on the Man in my life. I found that funny, he was 16years old!!! Time flew, I decided to marry, I received his 1st drunk call having my fiance on the other line! He only said "She chose u, ensure she doesnt cry anymore. I will get to you for every tear she sheds". We had our hearty laugh after he disconnected, but never knew he meant every word of it.
In no time, my little brother who couldnt recollect the name Pav Bhaji, instead preferred them calling Bun with Masala and onion grew to an extent of Being the Man incharge (P.S He still cant say pav bhaji)
Life doesnt give you a card notifying those precious moments, you just live them. Everyone one of us have a weird relationship with our sibling which we treasure and we have no means of expressing how much we love them. These emotions erupts out of the blue when you realize that life will not give you any more chances to express your love. Say it today, right now and be thankful for everything you had.
I know he will always be there, when I need him, when I dont need him, but the physical distance will always bother me. Being away from him for miles will make me miss him more.
He will always be the special Man in my life, he cant be replaced. Today after 15yrs he only called to confirm if I had actually turned blind for those few hours when he had hit my eyes! We will have many situations to clarify through out.. Except those where we had to question our love for each other.
The only reason why I would wish a younger brother for my daughter is him, its special. No cousin, friend, relative can give it to her.
A vague memory of him is what I have when he was a year old and I was 3. 2yrs difference and I couldnt hate him more for stealing the limelight. I was possessive of everyone around him, but he being the cutest with his curly hair, chubby cheeks and those all time drunk eyes.. Anyone could fall in love with him.
Never realized how I became the dependent on him. I was studious, he was smarter, I was emotional, he was practical, I was matured, he was impulsive. My never ending tears always found his arms, My over the top dramas of suicide always saved my his acts. 1 incident was when I gave up on life while I was 11yrs old and started banging head to the pillars of the stairs (Too much influenced by movies), he cooly arranged a note book for each of the pillars and watched while I got frustrated. I gave up after taking out his 11 books around the stairs.
We have our weirdest stories in lots to quote like above, my favorite being the one I mentioned. He moving to hostel was nothing less dramatic, what changed the equation was when he was back and he realized someone else had taken his duty of protecting me.
Through our walk at wee hours and his KBC kind of questions on the Man in my life. I found that funny, he was 16years old!!! Time flew, I decided to marry, I received his 1st drunk call having my fiance on the other line! He only said "She chose u, ensure she doesnt cry anymore. I will get to you for every tear she sheds". We had our hearty laugh after he disconnected, but never knew he meant every word of it.In no time, my little brother who couldnt recollect the name Pav Bhaji, instead preferred them calling Bun with Masala and onion grew to an extent of Being the Man incharge (P.S He still cant say pav bhaji)
Life doesnt give you a card notifying those precious moments, you just live them. Everyone one of us have a weird relationship with our sibling which we treasure and we have no means of expressing how much we love them. These emotions erupts out of the blue when you realize that life will not give you any more chances to express your love. Say it today, right now and be thankful for everything you had.
I know he will always be there, when I need him, when I dont need him, but the physical distance will always bother me. Being away from him for miles will make me miss him more.
He will always be the special Man in my life, he cant be replaced. Today after 15yrs he only called to confirm if I had actually turned blind for those few hours when he had hit my eyes! We will have many situations to clarify through out.. Except those where we had to question our love for each other.
The only reason why I would wish a younger brother for my daughter is him, its special. No cousin, friend, relative can give it to her.
What a touching post. Totally relate to this :)
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
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